Mother Nature (or Slugs on the Refrigerator)
WARNING: DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE A WEAK STOMACH, ARE CONTEMPLATING MOVING TO THE COUNTRYSIDE OR ARE PLANNING ON ADDING BABIES OR GOLDFISH TO YOUR HOUSEHOLD.
Today, Ellis and I woke up luxuriously at 7:30am. Kevin was just getting ready to go to work and decided to help him with his “chore” of feeding the fish. For a couple of days, we’ve been worried about our spotted fish, Pebbles. He’s been acting a bit wierd. This morning, Kev called me up stairs to see something on Pebbles’ back...a big yellowish lump.
After much research online, I realised that Pebbles had a tag-a-long...a fish louse. This small crustacean latches onto fish and sucks their blood, then lays thousands of eggs to feast on my poor fish. I fretted all day...checked on Pebbles and was petrified that I would come upstairs to find dear old P belly up (Some of you may know that I have been fretting about these fish since we got them, they just seem so fragile).
On one of my checks, I noticed that the louse was gone. Pebbles seemed pretty much back to normal and all was well...until I saw this tiny crab chasing my fish around the tank. Pebbles was relatively calm, but Gladiator was in full panic. I knew I had to rescue them. Of course, Ellis had been playing with the new fish net and it was no where to be found. I only had one choice. I ran downstairs an grabbed the only implement I thought could do the job...my antique silver serving spoon. I chased that louse all around the house (well, Pebbles and Gladiator’s house) and finally I caught it...and then flushed it straight down the toilet.
I have to admit, I was not completely calm. I couldn’t stop itching and I was soooooooooo disgusted. Lice in my fish tank, eating my fish. Well, I did what anyone in my adopted homeland would do, went downstairs to make a cup of tea.
As I walked into the kitchen, I looked at the fridge and saw slugs. Two small and one HUGE slug climbing up my refrigerator. I hate slugs. They are the single most vile things in the world and I can not stand to even look at them. It is the major downside of living where we do, as the place is heaving with them. I completely flipped out.
After a lot of pacing, phoning Kevin and laboured breathing, I decided that I had to do something...the largest of the slugs was sitting on top of one of the take away menus. I held my breath, grabbed the menu with slug and walked it to the bin at the end of the garden. I HATE SLUGS.
Nature...i love so many of your creations, but really, slugs and fish lice? Couldn’t you have just left those out? Oh and midges, mosquitos, those flying ants and hairy caterpillars...I feel very itchy.