Ellis is 3 weeks old today. It seems like he has been around much longer, but then on the other hand it seems like time has just flown by. Kevin went back to work for the first time today. Poor guy, who knows what chaos awaits him there!!

Ellis is still eating pretty well, but I have to admit I am getting a bit fed up of the whole regime. At the moment, I have to try and wake Ellis up every three hours. Feed him (while trying to keep him awake the whole time which involves putting him down and leaving him to scream), top him up with formula or expressed breast milk, and then express milk for half an hour. I have gotten to the point where I really begin to dread each feed. The reason we have to keep doing all of the extra is because he is so small and needs to gain weight. However, I have been so close to giving him the bottle. He isn't latching on well and its quite sore. It also means he's not that effective at getting th milk out and feeds are taking ages.

I know, I know...it has been such a struggle...why give up now, when we really just have one more small hurdle to overcome. We have come so far... However, I am just getting so fed up with all of the struggling. It doesn't help that I feel so unwell. I am going to speak to my midwife and a lactation consultant but I just feel quite depressed by the whole situation.

UPDATE: just spoke to midwife and we agreed to tail off the top ups and expressing to see how he does. Hopefully he will be OK. As for the latching on, apparently I have to be more vigilant and not let him be a lazy sucker...Or else I am creating problems for mself down the road. Off to sleep now